Four Gift Ideas for Newborns (and Their Parents)

If you’re heading to the Kensington area any time soon, you might be thinking of dropping in on William, Kate, George and baby Charlotte Elizabeth Diana, but you wouldn’t want to turn up empty handed would you? Buying gifts for newborns is difficult, especially if you’re offering a gift for a couple’s first child – they are likely to have everything they need and much, much more.

You also never really know whether the gift should be for the parents or the baby or both. Here’s some handy tips for offerings that might be appreciated:

1) Cheese. All of the cheese. Stinky cheese.

Cheese

There are many trials to overcome during pregnancy; morning sickness that actually lasts all day, constant discomfort and strangers rubbing your stomach, for example. There’s also the dietary restrictions which mean no booze, limited caffeine and no stinky, amazing, unpasteurised cheese.

Booze would probably not make a great gift – its sedative qualities not being particularly compatible with a baby waking every two hours – and a box of Yorkshire tea would be helpful, but fairly uninspiring.

Therefore, the smelliest, bluest cheese on the market could be the perfect present for anyone who has been banned from eating it for the previous nine months. We were sent two massive selections – they were amazing (i was allowed some too). 

It’s probably worth noting that this is only a decent gift if the recipients enjoyed smelly cheese in the first place – you could replace it with a massive sushi platter if that works better. Essentially anything that isn’t allowed during pregnancy but is fine with breast feeding is a perfect pressie. 

2) Baby clothes, but NOT for newborns

Baby ClothesBabies need clothes, it’s a fact. There have been numerous studies to back this up. However, most new parents will already have half the contents of their local Mothercare stuffed into the nursery’s already-bulging wardrobe. When babies are born, they tend to have more different outfits to choose from than Carrie Bradshaw and her Sex and the City mates added together. They all tend to be in newborn size, though – I think Elsa could have worn a different newborn babygrow every day until her 18th birthday.

So, here’s the clever bit – buy clothes for the little ‘un, but get them for aged six months and upwards and you will be onto a winner. It’s better value for money – babies never have as many clothes in the bigger sizes, so your outfit will receive more wears – and you’ll also have the joy of being tagged in a photo on Facebook of the cherub sporting your present six months after you’d forgotten you’d even bought it.

3) Box sets for the long nights of feeding 

BoxsetsBabies like eating, they also seem fairly keen on crying. This means that there are some very long nights to be had when you have a tiny baby around. With the average newborn feed lasting for flaming hours (scientific term), you crave entertainment and what better way to while away the hours than by binge-watching the latest big TV series?

We made our way through The L Word, Orange is the New Black and Jill even managed to complete every single episode of Gossip Girl – I think she’s in line for an MBE for that achievement.

Seen something worth watching recently? Help a new parent out and introduce them.

4) Black and white books for babies

Laurel and HardyBabies, much like a drunken adult, find it difficult to focus. Also like drunk adults, they have underdeveloped motor skills and are sick all the time, but that is by the by.

One thing that calmed Elsa was staring at black and white pictures – for some highly technical and complicated reason, babies’ eyes find it easier to make out monochrome images. It’s also the reason that they are big Laurel and Hardy fans. Maybe.

There’s plenty of black and white baby books and, if it stops a crying fit, you will be a hero. A ruddy hero.

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  1. Advice on Having a Second Child for Couple on State Handouts | Bewildered Dad
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